Majority of individuals often falsely believe that they have vast amounts of control over others. Due to these false beliefs, they are convinced in their mind, that they are therefore responsible for the many things that (in reality) are actually out of their control. So what happens are feelings of overwhelm, anxiety, a sense of out-of controlness, and guilt.
People are thus encouraged to consider the ideal that the only true control anyone has over anything is over themselves–more precisely over their own thoughts, feelings and actions. This concept is hard for the majority of individuals who always need to feel in control over others. This ideal may totally contradict the persons perception of typical guilt/blame dynamics. The idea of human beings being fully responsible for themselves and what they do control is easier said then done.
We are fully responsible for our own thoughts, feelings and actions,. while others are fully responsible for their own thoughts feelings and actions. In essence, while we are fully responsible for how we react to others, we are not at all responsible for how others react to us.
The advantages of adopting and incorporating this perspective include: 1. an enhanced sense of personal power. 2. clarification of boundaries between self and others, 3. far less general overwhelm. 4. A vast reduction in guilt/blame dynamics. 5. An increased ability to find compassion for all human beings.